Life really does not make sense anymore. I gave it all, and now I was left behind with.. nothing. That’s a mistake they say you do not have to do, but how? You were so real, so magical.. so special. I really felt you loved me, and that’s the only reason why I gave it all for you. Oh God, I wish you knew how much you mean to me, how much it hurts to be without you. I saw you so real, I loved you at once, we loved each other so purely, never came through my mind that we could ever be in this situation, that’s why I loved you and made you the first in my life, my real dream. Nobody can blame me, I just loved you, in the most purely way that I could. I tried so hard all this time, I got so far, we got so far together and we promised that; no matter what, we’d be always together. These are the things that hurt me the most. Because once again; it was real. How can people trade real love for the world? I don’t understand. Love’s something so pure and .. it cannot be described. You probably don’t even think of me anymore the way you used to, maybe now your mind is busy thinking about getting a new and more “comfortable” and ‘free’ life. While I am here still thinking of us. Why am I the last standing when the smoke clears?..
I would say this is not fair for two souls who love each other, but in this world of little consequence.. there’s nothing I can do to change this, I did all I could, and somehow I still do, I fight in my heart and head. It’s like a really “war in my mind”. But I also know, you prefer doing other things than choosing us. How? I don’t know, something I am still trying to find out..
Now, I have to figure out this life, that, currently, makes no sense. I won’t give up, this life, this love. Maybe I am suffering and thinking so many things that are not the best ones, but our love sustains me.. Still.
The same way you said we wouldn’t give up and would be always together, you’ll forget me, like another guy else. You may say no, but that’s exactly what you said before for so many other things that now, you do. Isn’t fair, is it? I hope someday you think of me and remember all that we were together and can be together, because I am tired of listening to you saying “we can’t”, and not even try harder. Cause that’s what I always said, love is not easy, but for me, giving up on this, is not a choice… So sad for me I am the only one that is still here… Wish you were here with me, fighting, facing this life together.
"The spark or glow in your eyes since the moment I saw you", "Something so real and special that I’ve never seen before". Tell me, how can you trade those things for the world? I don’t know you, but I.. your face is all that I see. The sky, the moon, the stars, the roads, the cameras, the lenses, the filters, the flowers, the sun, the clouds, the people walking and passing by, it all reminds me of you. The songs, the artists, the dreams we had, dreams I have, did you know you’re my best and most important dream? You really are. Why did you go? Who the hell was I?.. now I am thinking.. who the hell was I.. Who the hell.. and, who even care about this? they all say "it’s ok", but let me tell you, it is not okay. It’s love, it was and it’ll always be love, the only thing worth knowing. What for do I wanna see the world by myself and have it all if I do not have you? If I wanted ALL was just to share it with you, because my life with you is beautiful.. just to share it all with you, and show you what I am capable of, what I am worth it.. and that I love you, everyday of our lives.. I am still here, for you.